The Dark Side Of Improving Yourself: My Most important Article

The Dark Side Of Improving Yourself: My Most important Article April 3, 2018Leave a comment

Standing over the rabbit hole…

One foot hovering over the dark abyss

Someone grabbed you by the hand and led you to it

offering you a peek over the edge

body shaking

For whatever reason, you did what most people on earth will never have the guts to do…

You jumped in

Little did you know it was a descent into madness…

Improving yourself is not all mangoes and mars bars, there’s a real dark side that can grip you, rip you, shred you up, eat you, and shit you out.

Choosing to improve yourself means seeing things you can’t unsee… like your true potential.

Once you are shown, that with a little work, you can do, be, and have anything you want… you can’t go back from that truth…

and therein lies the first big dark problem:

You are for once in your life, not just aware of what you don’t want, you are aware of what you KNOW you could be… fully aware of the gap between who you are and who you know you can be.

And it can torture you and everyone around you to death if you don’t make it out the other side.

Closing that gap is the final stretch of the rabbit hole and the closer you get to closing that gap, the bigger the light will be at the end of your tunnel.

But what if I told you that by going down the rabbit hole you realize there was no rabbit hole in the first place, or that the very act of going through it completely destroys its existence in the first place?

Let me explain.

We enter the rabbit hole for various reasons, but mostly we desperately want to improve an area of our lives.

Maybe it’s your financial situation, maybe it’s your health, or even your dating life. Whatever the reason, someone offers you the red pill and you dive into the hole most people are too scared to go in…

And you find out how fucked up you truly are.

And get to work like crazy improving yourself.

Unwiring social conditioning, chipping away at your insecurities, and gathering evidence you deserve to be happy and proud of yourself.

Constantly afraid that if you stop hustling, you’ll slip backwards… back to where you came from. So you strive, struggle, and strain your way to the top, grinding and sweating all the way up.

Some people do get to the top, while most do not.

But here’s the twisted secret: Even if you reach the top, you won’t feel like you made it.

You can make all the money and still feel broke.

You can have all the friends and still feel lonely.

If you can have everything and still feel like you are falling.

You’ve become addicted to the struggle.


There is a secret about this whole industry that is rarely talked about.

Because in all the work we do to rewire ourselves and remove social conditioning, the one thing we don’t unwire is the most basic of all beliefs:

Scarcity is my default.

If you ever feel like if you stopped hustling you’d fall backward, lose it all, and slide down to nothing, then that means being nothing is still your true default as a person.

And thinking that is true will ensure you never feel abundant. In fact, all of your self improvement will actually do nothing but REINFORCE you are nothing.

If you are constantly grinding to be more happy, it only reinforces you are not happy to begin with.

So if you don’t realize this is a self improvement trap, you’ll never make it out of the rabbit hole and the light at the end of the tunnel will get dimmer and dimmer until there’s no more light, and no way out.

The secret to improving yourself is you need proof abundance is your default or you’ll always be running away from scarcity.

If you can only retain one sentence from this post, this is it:

You can’t chase abundance just as you can’t chase happiness.

You can run away from scarcity enough to stand on your own two feet and get some stability in order to completely drop it and operate from abundance but you can’t run away from misery fast enough to get out the other side of the hole.

Running away from misery will get you only to a certain point then it will start taking you two steps back for every step forward.

And is it true, if you stopped grinding, you’d slide backwards?

I don’t think so.

Here’s an example.

If I gave you 100 billion dollars, would you lose all motivation to work?


For a while.

Then inspiration would kick in and you would do business projects coming from abundance.

Out of inspiration.

Your life changes when you realize you don’t have to hustle out of pain.

You don’t need to hustle out of desperation, you can hustle out of inspiration.

Hustling out of desperation is to be running away from yourself.

How can you fight the world if you are always beating yourself up?

Being best friends with yourself won’t make you too comfortable and give up on your goals, it’ll make you go even harder. Having children will make you want to be a better person, and same goes with you accepting yourself.

This is the big illusion of self improvement and the age old debate of self acceptance vs self improvement:

“If I fully accept myself as who I am, I would lose the drive to go do anything in life”.

And that is bullshit.

You’d do everything you are doing right now but from a completely different place…

Inspiration not desperation.

Same path, except one is much easier.

And never forget, as my man Mike Kemski says, the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow is just an illusion… it’s only there to get your ass walking the path, and as you walk the path you pick up real nuggets of gold along the way.

There is no way to happiness, happiness is the way.

The way out of the self improvement rabbit hole is to stop running away from the entrance and start running to the exit, and as soon as you do that the entire rabbit hole disintegrates around you as it never even existed in the first place.

There is no exit.

you were always perfect…

you were always going to make it…

at least now you can enjoy the ride.

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